Okay- so today started out great, getting stuff done, teaching the campers and EVEN did some work on the “Forgotten Script”. It felt good- made a commitment with 2 of my amazingly talented writer pals that we’ll all cheer & drag each other through our respective projects and it feels nice. So- THEN, I call this Dr. office. He was a dude that has been seeing my Mom for general stuff. Anyway- I get a bill from him for about $400.00 – AWESOME. Anyway- she can’t afford that on her SS and we certainly can’t so I call. Thing is- had they billed us in 30 day increments like they had, it would have been about $15.00 per bill but they let that crap sit for MONTHS then spring $400.00 on us. Not possible. So, I call and get connected to the billing dept. I proceed to tell the gal that my Mom only has Medicare and possibly some Blue Shield supplementary insur but that her assist. living has all that info and why didn’t they get it from them BEFORE all this $ owed accrued. She says- I don’t know that place but we need this money. I say well- I guess you better hope Blue Shield can come up with it because neither she nor we have $400.00 to drop. She says she doesn’t know those people (at her home) and I say- well, I don’t know why I’m getting this bill anyway- everything goes there and they submit it to her insur- why would this bill come to me. She says… (wait for it;)
“Well, your her daughter, it’s your job to take care of her.”
LONG PAUSE.
She doesn’t say anything, because I’m pretty sure that she knows she fucked up.
Now, if you have read any of this blogs’ past entries, you may be a little familiar with my… impulse control issue. That and my periodic insurmountable inability to PAUSE WHEN AGITATED and just run my mouth. I will give this away though: considering how I COULD have reacted, I think this broad got off easy.
(After our loaded beat, eerily calm voice:)…”Did you seriously just say that to me?” I question.
(Remorse immediately detectable, but not helping her now, quietly:) “Yes…”
Restraint removed, brakes off, momentum builds with the fury and hurt that can only build over YEARS: “Are you FUCKING KIDDING ME? Lady, you don’t even KNOW me! You don’t KNOW me, do you?! (Small”no…”) That’s right! Let me ask you this, do you KNOW what it’s like to watch a parent slowly slip away in front of your eyes every day?! (…no.) Do you know what it’s like to try and raise a family, beat CANCER and still try and support an ailing parent in a country that could give TWO SHITS about it’s sick or elderly?! DO. YOU.KNOW ANYTHING. ABOUT. THAT?! (…no.) WOW. Well, I hope- I HOPE you feel like a real ASSHOLE right now. How fucking DARE you presume to know ANYTHING about me? (”I didn’t mean…_)
So, at this point, badass that I am, start crying. I can’t let Billing Bitch hear that and Scout is crying (Just woke up- I do well at hiding my tirades from the kids) “You know what- I have to go- TAKE CARE OF MY LIFE and I’ll be calling back later, to speak with your SUPERVISOR.”
Click- FAST- before she hears my voice crack. Okay… now cry. Fine. Get it together- get Scout and proceed.
Now that the rage has worn off I feel a bit bad for her. Had no idea, obviously young and just trying to do a stupid job that requires her to shake down people for money they don’t have… Bummer. Anyway- I will call back but to clear it up/handle it. I won’t narc on her- probably f-ed up her day just as she did mine. What struck me is… I have no idea about HER either. As I ripped her a new orifice, SHE could have been sitting there with no left arm, or with an unwanted pregnancy, or horrible acne and a goat-like B.O. issue… I have no idea. I guess- the lesson for BOTH of us would be to not judge so quickly or harshly…. It’s a great sentiment NOW- 9 hours later but- it’s an entirely different scene to put into instant action… Ick. Gonna just try and revel in the successes of the 1st half of the day…. Which, for a Monday- was a LOT better… For both of us.